How Can I Prove That My Children Would Be Better Off With Me Than Their Mother?

Note: The DearEsq free 'ask a lawyer' site is offered as a free informational service to the public and is not intended as legal advice. Laws vary from state-to-state, and in addition every situation is unique, and relevant facts may not be known. The answer to the question posed below may not apply to in your state or to your situation. For legal advice in your state and your situation you should consult with an attorney in your state who is familiar with the rules and laws in your state.

‘I recently moved to another state hoping to find better work to support my two daughters. I left them behind with their mother so that they could start school seeing as how their mom would rather start a custody war and have them start school a year late. I’ve only been in the new state for a few months and already they are bringing me to court for child support I owe in another state. The girls’ mom never holds a steady job and has been living with her mom since we divorced (3 years ago) and has been in and out of jail. She also has multiple mental disorders and relies on her family to care for the kids. I know men have a less likely chance to gain full custody but I have a good job and home and have been in a committed relationship. Is there anything I can do to prove to the court that they would be better off with me?’This will likely turn on whether you applied for permission to move away with the state in which your children resides. If you have a support agreement in one state, moving to another state will not get rid of that agreement and you will still have to pay support. Support stays with the children, not the parents. If you stopped paying support while under a support agreement, you may have violated that agreement.

Question: If you take issue with the mother’s ability to parent, you can apply for a modification to the existing custody agreement. The court frowns on taking custody away from any parent unless there is proof of serious issues that negatively affect your children’s best interests. Consider contacting an attorney in your children’s home state to look into the mother’s issues and seek a court order to deal with the support and custody issues.