“I am legally seperated from my wife, and she wont sign the divorce papers. I have children, and i have primary custody of them. I also have a girlfriend, is it ok for my girlfriend to be around my children? Ive kind of been scared because i know my ex-wife might try to find some way to use it against me. please help.”
It is ok for your girlfriend to be around your children, but practically speaking you should be careful. Mothers in this situation are known to level false allegations of abuse (both violent and sexual) against fathers, particularly mothers who a) don’t want to formally end the marriage, and b) may be unhappy about the father’s new girlfriend. It is also extremely common for mothers in this situation to look for something – anything – to try to change custody to themselves, and for this reason the longer you can go without rocking the boat, the better – because the longer you have custody, the harder it will be for your ex to be successful in a bid to change custody (which bid is often based on the false allegations).
Ideally, you would get the divorce finalized as soon as you can – if she won’t sign, your lawyer can get you a court date to finalize the divorce, and she can either show up and sign, or she will default, and the court will order the divorce to be final without her signature.
And check out this DadsRights.org and read the information there about custody, and false allegations.