“I have recently came across and issue, I have gotten pregnant by a guy that had a girlfriend. All of the details have came out and now I am getting emails from her asking me questions and I have continuously apologized for everything but I am keeping my baby. Last week I got a call from both of them telling me that they would like me to have an abortion and that I was lying about my medical condition that would put me at risk if I were to have another abortion. They told me that they wanted proof from a doctor and that they wanted the name and information of my physician so that they can contact my doctor to find out if I am telling the truth about my medical history. I have been told by many people that they are not going to hurt me but I want to protect myself and my baby and I am not sure if I should take their want for me to have an abortion as a threat?
My question is that with all of these emails at work and phone calls can I or should I file a Restraining Order on both of them? Or should I wait to see if this will continue they have not made any threats toward me at this time and I am wondering if I would be taking it too far if I were to file a restraining order.”
First, just to be clear, nobody can make you have an abortion. Period.
Have you tried asking them to leave you alone for now (you will of course need to communicate with the father once the baby is born, and for the next eighteen years)? Going the route of seeking a restraining order is very adversarial, and can only serve to make worse a relationship which at best is difficult right now – that of you and the biological father of your child. You are going to have to have a relationship with him now for the next 18 years, as you share a child. This is undoubtedly why the girlfriend wants you to abort your baby – so that there will not be that connection between you and the father. But that’s her problem, not yours. That said, if either of their behavior becomes abusive – physically or verbally – or if they will not honor your request that they not contact you at work, you may wish to consult an attorney about whether to request a restraining order.