“15 months ago i sold my Illinois home and moved here to Whitney Point, NY with my 80 yr old male friend. He didn’t put a penny towards this house before, during or after the sale yet I loved him and thought we’d always be together. now he is gone and asked to go by the County Sheriffs office for sexually harassing a female librarian in town here. That’s a different matter. Now he’s in Missouri with a married daughter. He left here 3 weeks ago. The first of the month came by and he emailed me to say he would be willing to leave his pension ($625.00) in the bank here so i can add my half of the mortgage to it for when the bank automatically withdraws the $455.00 every month.) I Also have durable Power of Attorney and regular POA over him. I am not about to take this man’s money on a monthly basis but when we lived here together we always shared the money since i get $960) a month social sec. I want him to continue to pay his half as long as i live or he lives I am 64 he is now 80 his health is extremely poor my health is very good. I did everything for him dressed him daily helped him shower, fed him when his right arm stopped to move, i curled his moustache . I shaved him , cleaned his clothes and he wore a clean outfit each day, i wiped his butt every day 2-3 times, i helped him get in and out of chairs even in public places, i put his jacket on and off. All he has contributed these past 15 months is paying half a mortgage the total mortgage is 455. it includes taxes and insurance If I continue to pay on my own there is very little or no money left for me to buy gasoline, pay my utilities, buy food, pay for care of out 8 pets, make the car payments which is in both our names it is 187.00 a month. I need some advice and a attorney wants an up front amount of money to answer my questions i don’t even have 25.00 in the bank I do not drink do not smoke do not gamble do not even go out of the house much due to no money i never had kids. i have no sisters or brothers i am really all alone in this world he has 6 kids from 3 different marriages.. Right now they are all calling me the bad one who threw him out (Really the police did) and no one talks to me What do i want? i want him to pay for half the car half the house half the car insurance and i’ll be happy.”

If he’s not on title to the house there is nothing you can do to make him pay half the mortgage. If he is, then you could do a partition action, which will end up getting the house sold out from underneath you. With respect to the car, if you are both on the loan, then the loan company will look to either of you to pay the obligation. It sounds like you are getting all the use out of the vehicle.

Be honest, you do want him to pay money. But it’s difficult to create an obligation to pay out of nothing. Did you have a contract to wipe his butt and clean his clothes that he did not pay on? If so, you could sue to enforce that obligation. But if there was no breach of a service contract and he’s not getting any benefit of the items you are paying on, I am having a tough time figuring out what kind of action you would file to create an obligation for him to pay.