“My ex-wife is telling my daughter that at the age of twelve she can make the decision to come and see me when she wants to. My ex-wife is very manipulative and has denied me my legal rights and has contradicted the divorce decree. She is also using rewards to get my daughter not to want to come and see me. We had to go back to court to get my visitation back. Will I need to go back to court to keep my visitation going at that time?

Is there an Oklahoma or Federal law stating this? If so can you give me the statute?”

I know of no state in which a child gets to make the decisions regarding visitation once they reach a certain age. However, it is a very common misbelief that at the age of 12 - for some reason it’s always the age of 12 - a child can make that choice. So your ex-wife may genuinely believe this.

In any event yes, unfortunately, if your ex denies your visitation, you will need to go back to court. In some states denying visitation is grounds for a change in custody.


Anne P. Mitchell, Esq. is a noted family law expert, Internet law expert, and Professor of Law at Lincoln Law School of San Jose. Contact This Author

State laws vary, and the above is intended as general advice, and not direct legal advice regarding any one particular situation in any one state. For direct personal legal advice related to your own situation you should consult an attorney familiar with the laws of your state and with your situation.